Another Christmas

Without being at home, Christmas just gets more meaningless every year & I'm nearing to not feeling anything anymore. The only unchanged thing is I still feel unnamed anger when the non Christians publish their wishlist all over their social networks. The true meaning & essence of Christmas has been twisted.


It's just so stupid. People give reason to shop for Christmas, then they have Christmas special speed dating. Christmas sales & offers, that, I get it. And also people feel extra lonely & depressed when they're alone on this day.


Gosh, come on, for you non Christians, it's just another Public Holiday. Stop dropping the pathetic bomb. Grow up please, whatever age you are.


I spent this Christmas early morning in church. And even in church, it's just another service. Nothing special. Everyone was the same. No one is extra friendly or extra joyful. Maybe this is the disease that every citizen in big city has. Someone said that I chose the wrong church to go to. No comment on that.


So, during this festival, I miss home sorely. & I promised myself hard that next year I'll go home for Christmas & Thanksgiving.


Well, I'm sure everyone had fun this Christmas? How was your Christmas shopping?

Another Reunion

Dad, mum & sis just came & left last week. Had been looking forward till I couldn't sleep the night before meeting them.
Took a week leave to go to dad's neck of the woods.
Hadn't been there for 2 - 3 years, I think. Things are more or less the same in the town area.
How weird it is that when I go back with my family, it looks like a town that I'm familiar with.
The roads, the landmarks & all.
But when I go with boyfie & family, it feels like a totally different place. As if I've never been there in my whole life.
Went for the my favourite local dishes. Galloped a glass of old town white coffee & got myself a 3-day stomach ache for that. Yes, I'm coffee intolerant. Not caffeine; I love tea. Hmm, as much as I appreciated it, it's still not worth the torture.
It's not many drops of enzymes or propolis could really help.


Dad went for high school reunion for the 1st time of his life after 30 years.
He came back around 2 a.m. It's not a regular thing, okay.
Everyone was going to sleep. So, I offered to wait for him because we didn't have spare keys for the house. Couldn't sleep in peace till he got back.
You can't be too careful.
After all, these are people you've not met for 30 years.
One day, someone just found you on Netlog & said he's your schoolmate.
They can be anyone they say they are.
But I admit I was amusingly paranoid.
Didn't tell anyone though.


The following day, dad's childhood friend, Uncle Tai took the liberty to bring us around the whole day. Breakfast, coffee break, then his neighbourhood tour. After picking us up from the mall, he decided to drive us to Kampar to pay my brother a surprise visit.
So, off we went & he was surprised. Happy to see us, sad to leave us even though he knows he's going to see us again in a while when he's going back for semester break.
Forever an emo boy!


One of the things that I really would like to shout out to humans is Stop thinking Money is more precious than Time.
I didn't realise since when I've been holding to this motto, but I'm a strong believer.
I will not line up for anything if it's going to be more than 15 minutes. Half an hour if I'm in good mood.
Queueing up for food, big bang sales, etc. is not worth any minute of my time at all.
No food has made me feel I don't mind waiting for it.
I will wait for books & people. Not free gifts or buy one free one promotion.
Believe me, I am very patient when it comes to waiting.
All thanks to my dad who always forgot to pick me up from school or tuition.
Given that there was no spare of mobile from my dad, I learned to endure the torture & enjoy the process. I mean the waiting.
Clothes - on the other hand, I would like to stay unclassified.
Of course, it all depends of the degree of likeness & the length of queue.
But in general, I would think that I can always get better ones & nice clothes will never stop being designed. So, why the rush?


When I posted "I use money to buy time", it appeared that everyone thought I spent money for shopping during free time. And I know why is that. I meant, I use money to save time. I would rather pay more to reach my destination than having to wait for an hour for the bus. I would rather go for normal price than having to queue up for some promotions. Of course, if there's no queue, I wouldn't mind. Well, why spend more if you can save? After all, my point is my priority is Time, not Money. It doesn't mean Money is not important to me. But of course, time will come when you have no choice but to choose Money over Time.


I've tendered my resignation last week while I was on leave.
I've been backstabbed for the first time at work. It felt awesome. I was pissed as I didn't like being blamed for something which was not my fault.
After a while, I just left it & didn't give a fuck.
Again, I feel pity for you. Your world can be as tiny as your dick. Or pussy.
If this is the meaning of life to you, I will let you enjoy it. I can only laugh at you, with despise.


Going to enter another phase of life. New job, new environment, I'm still excited.
Hope I won't be polluted by the numbness of the society. Just don't want to end up like any other person with no passion for work or life anymore. Robotic, meaningless life is one of my biggest fear.


I look forward to the new job. I trust things will just get better & better.
I believe in the hands of God, I am sheltered.

F.I.F.A.

Finally It's Friday Again.

Wonder how long I'll appreciate Friday until I finally get numb of it.

I kept getting all those weird dreams these few days.

All the crazy ideas in my mind.

What a remarkable Friday.

Met with LRT break down for the 1st time.

Waited for more than 1 hour with Thasha.

Called Wan to go out for dinner, knew it was going to be an endless wait.

Saw Chan Yann there, caught up a little bit.

Saw Karen, on the way to meet her parents who came all the way from Germany to visit her.

Added someone I met in LRT on facebook, because we are state neighbours. Ha~

Saw someone I think was from high school who asked me what's going on.

Wonder if she remembers me.

I have vivid memory, because she might be one of the anti-lynda group members.

It's Saturday now, because I was too sleepy & tired to write last night.

Raining very heavily.

Feels calm & weird at the moment.

Was in my room for the whole day.

Got my package from Dad, convocation form.

Finally I'm graduating.

Can't wait for that day to come.

Just excited to meet my parents & Corner Lot gang.

Just want dad & mum to feel proud & happy.

That finally their girl has got out from university into the big realistic society.

Kay, time to shower & out for movie.

I've got a date! *wink*

Something not Lasting

Got an first official full time job in life.

Working with Australian airline.

I must say, every budget airline sucks.

Wonder if Air Asia is any better.

Maybe not.

The more policies there are, the more yellings there are.

But nothing is perfect.

I just hate the tight schedule.

Anyway, I think I'm going to quit soon.

This is going to be a long self discovery road.

I hate that when things you don't want to see or know the most, they keep showing up.

Numbers, even all the states' names give me goosebumps.

I'm not proud of myself that I can remember the agent code, the state & city codes.

Even if my Geography improves.

This is where you learn to handle situations.

By learning how to lie confidently.

And what I hate most is not Price Beat Guarantee, it's when there're flight delays or cancellation.

That morning, you'll receive a lot of emails notifying every staff about them, together with all the flight numbers, origin & destination.

That is when you know it's going to be a long day.

All the mess. All the whys.

Some people just don't get it.

No matter how many times you try to explain, they don't fucking listen.

And after you got to know that S'poreans are not allowed to curse, you just wish every call is made by them.

And I'll never ever do a part time job again.

Unless they pay me by the end of the day.

Really miss home.

To forget about everything here.

Living in the same city with people who caused you pain.

It is not pleasant at all.

What you can do is imagining yourself killing them over & over again in your head.

The most brutal ways you can think of due to a hobby of watching horror movies.

Just be impressed of yourself that you can eat while watching the neck being cut off & blood panting out.

What good can it do?

They're still alive.

Then, you started praying, wishing they would meet with an accident or something.

Whatever, just die.

Pray hard squeezing your eyes wishing that day will come soon.

Then, the only thing that makes you feel better is you know their lives are messy.

And you know, they are suffering.

And you just have a feeling they're going to die soon.

This is how my optimism serves me just fine.

I have all reasons to believe that I'm being disturbed by some psycho lady

whom I met a few times while waiting for bus.

She talks to herself with weird expressions and she wears a cartoon pink watch.

She used her phone light to flash at me.

Fucking crazy bitch.

I feel like killing her as well.

Talk about anger management & self defence.

I've got a stun gun.

A Box of Emotions

As I was being tortured by the sensation of heat yesterday, I had to convince myself my determination to finish my assignments *arrghh, the word* wouldn't be melted down by the crazy hot sun.

Around 6am, I was waken up by the sounds of miracle -----it was the thunder. Thank God~

The gratefulness I felt, I could not explain...as I felt so touched and blessed that I went back to my dreams with a smile on my face, knowing that today would be a great day.

An hour after, I was waken up by another sound------annoyance...my handphone, though it was bringing good news. My classes today have been cancelled. Well, they say, good things come in a couple.

But I had to use my energy to open my eyes wider to forward the message to the snake & turtle.

*sleepiness fading* Some more, the unexpected reply from the snake, kaka caucau...so I grabbed the chance to express how beautiful the rain is at the moment. And so she replied again & said she's going back to her dreamland too.

Because I'm an unbelievably light sleeper, I knew I couldn't go back to sleep anymore. But...but....it just started to rain. How could I be so cruel & ruin my chance of having the world's most perfect bedtime ever? As so I told my dear roommate, & I forced myself to sleep back...splendid~ *wink*

I woke up feeling not satisfied enough, but it was time to wake up. Can't be greedy, ey?

So here I am, writing this post, because I was thinking, how could I miss carving this unforgettable day on a big stone? (Google won't go bankrupt right?)

I wish everyday is today, just the weather, not the date.

The wind breezing. Today has like the best weather ever.

Even the birds' chirping sounds nicer, I don't really appreciate them much usually.

Everything is perfect, except for the reminder of assignment due dates keeps ringing for the whole day & my intestine inflammation is eating me up.

How nice if I don't have to do anything..just lying there, sitting here for the whole day.

The Colours of all objects around seem brighter, nicer. I love the idea of having eyeballs! *rofl*

Just yesterday, I was complaining how the world has gone into all the bad things.

And my day is started with a sign telling I'm being taken care of, no matter how disappointing yesterday could be.

Well, life is always related to imperfection somehow, because we, humans will never be satisfied and therefore, a better day than yesterday is something to be thankful about. But no matter how great today is, we can still come up with something to mumble about.

Arrr, screw it. I want to enjoy today.

As usual, Live Life, Love Life, peeps.